Reclaiming Pleasure: A Soft Practice for Healing Sexual Shame
Shame is one of the heaviest emotions we carry—especially when it comes to sex, intimacy, and pleasure.
For many of us, this shame didn’t begin with our own choices. It was planted in us through silence, judgment, or fear. Maybe we were told our desires were wrong, that our bodies were dangerous, or that pleasure was something to hide.
And yet, deep down, a part of us longs for something different: softness, connection, and the freedom to feel at home in our own bodies.
This practice—what I call the Reclaiming Pleasure Meditation—is an invitation to meet yourself with compassion, release old shame, and open the door to worthiness and joy.
Why Shame Around Pleasure Runs Deep
Sexual shame often begins long before we even realize what it is. Maybe it was the absence of conversations when we needed guidance. Maybe it was the way curiosity was met with disapproval. Maybe it was the cultural messages that told us our bodies were “too much” or “not enough.”
Shame is sneaky—it doesn’t always feel like guilt or embarrassment. Sometimes it feels like numbness. Other times, it feels like disconnection or confusion. It can live in the body as tension in the chest, heaviness in the belly, or even a fog that makes it hard to trust or feel.
But here’s the truth: shame is not who you are. It’s a story you absorbed. And stories can be rewritten.
Meeting Shame with Compassion
When we begin to turn inward with gentleness, we often find a younger version of ourselves—one who first absorbed those painful messages. That child or teenager may have felt silenced, judged, or afraid.
Instead of pushing that part away, what if we could meet them with compassion? What if we could say:
You didn’t do anything wrong. You were never broken. You are worthy of tenderness, love, and safe pleasure.
When you breathe into that truth—even if it feels faint or unfamiliar—you begin to loosen shame’s grip.
Asking the Body for Insight
One of the most powerful steps in healing sexual shame is simply asking the body:
Where am I holding this?
You don’t need to analyze. Just notice. Maybe it lives in your belly, behind your eyes, or wrapped around your heart. Then, ask:
What is this shame trying to protect?
What does it believe?
Is that belief actually true?
Often, shame thinks it’s keeping us safe—safe from judgment, rejection, or hurt. But what it really does is keep us from the very connection we long for. By bringing curiosity and breath to these places, you invite your body into truth: I am not broken. I am not too much. I am worthy of joy.
Reclaiming Worthiness and Pleasure
Healing shame isn’t about forcing yourself to feel pleasure overnight. It’s about gently reclaiming your worthiness, moment by moment.
You are not dirty.
You are not shameful.
You are not too much.
You are not not enough.
You were born whole. Born worthy of tenderness, of pleasure, of joy. Your body is not the enemy—it is your home, your compass, your sacred ground.
Even if no one ever told you before, know this: you are worthy of love and safe, expansive pleasure exactly as you are.
Integration: Carrying the Practice Into Daily Life
Healing shame is not a one-time meditation. It is a soft, ongoing unfolding. Some days you may feel release and relief; other days, numbness or confusion may rise. All of it is part of your healing.
There’s nothing to fix. Nothing to rush. The path back to yourself is not about arriving at a “perfect” place—it’s about allowing space for curiosity, compassion, and presence.
As you return to your daily life, carry this knowing with you: you don’t have to have all the answers. You only have to keep showing up softly, honestly, and gently.
Your healing is sacred. Your pleasure is sacred. And both belong to you.
Working Together on Healing Sexual Shame
If this meditation resonated with you, know that you don’t have to walk this journey alone.
In my practice at Intima Couples & Sex Therapy PLLC, I specialize in creating safe, compassionate spaces for exploring intimacy, sexuality, and emotional healing. Whether you’re navigating sexual shame, struggling with intimacy in your relationship, or simply longing to feel more connected to yourself, therapy can offer the support and insight you need.
I work with individuals and couples in Colorado—both in person in Lakewood and virtually across the state. Together, we can:
Create emotional safety for exploring your relationship with your body and sexuality.
Gently untangle shame and the messages that no longer serve you.
Build deeper connection and intimacy with yourself and your partner.
Reclaim pleasure, joy, and worthiness as your birthright.
Take the Next Step
🌿 If you’d like to explore this work together, I invite you to schedule an initial 50-minute session with me. For just $49, this session gives you a chance to experience the safety and insight we can create together.
Yes - I accept many major insurance plans too! Learn More Here
📖 You can also download my free guide, Sacred Spaces: Creating Safety for Insight, to begin building practices of safety, reflection, and grounding in your own life.
✨ And if you’d like to continue practicing on your own, you can watch the full Reclaiming Pleasure Meditation on my YouTube channel, Everyday Therapy. or just hit the play button below.
Your healing doesn’t have to be rushed. You don’t have to carry shame alone.
Step by step, breath by breath, you can reclaim your softness, your pleasure, and your truth.
